ReOrientation

“Ms. Z, you broke my heart!”

Alondra came running up to me straight from her classroom, and attacked me from behind with a bear hug and this oh-so-dramatic declaration.

“What do you mean I broke your heart Alondra?!”

“You didn’t came yesterday!”

(And no, 'came' is not a typo)

Apparently, while I was at ReOrientation for the long weekend with the other 80 or so JVs in the Southwest, the kids missed me! Another of my favorite third graders told me that they weren’t able to have any fun while I was gone.  Ah, their flare for the dramatic keeps me laughing!  I’ve realized that stories about my kids are generally lacking from my blog, so from here on out I’ll do my best to include some of the funniest, most inspiring, or heart-wrenching anecdotes.

Today with the kids was wonderful. We had just the right number of tutors and just enough homework to keep everyone occupied. Over the retreat, I thought a lot about patience.  I’ve noticed that my patience has been tested in many ways in the last six months. Overall, I’ve done a decent job at keeping my cool, but keeping frustrations inside is not always good.  Today I felt like a different person with the students – I was so even-keeled, so calm despite their typical craziness.  I attributed this to being away for a few days and missing them. I was so excited to come back! I want to hold onto that feeling, and some of the talks from ReO gave me some ideas on how to do that. More on that as the weeks go by...

And now, a brief ReO Recap.  The theme of the retreat was Social Justice, which is, after all, one of the four tenants of JVC.  We started the weekend with a reflection based on the words that we, current JVs, used in our application essays. It was neat to hear our own words reflected back to us, and to realize that we were all drawn to the program for similar reasons. 

Over the course of the weekend, we heard from four guest speakers:

1 – Mike Duffy: USF professor who spoke about Catholic Social Thought and shared an extensive social justice/Ignatian spirituality book list.

2 – Fr. Greg Boyle: Previously mentioned in this blog, G gave more or less the same talk I heard back in September at USC.  He also incorporated some stories from his book into mass on Saturday evening!

3 – Kate Carter: Former JVC staff member who spoke about Faith in Action.  She shared some thoughts about incorporating our spirituality and our work.

4 – Fumi Tosu: FJV and theology teacher who spoke about Ignatian discernment. This talk was super helpful and comforting. 

Perhaps my favorite element of the retreat was that each morning and evening, a different casa led a unique prayer or spirituality activity.  We did all sorts of things: created our own prayer flags, had a feet washing ceremony, read an adapted version of the stations of the cross with a social justice focus, shared – and burned – prayer intentions, drew in sidewalk chalk, and went down to the beach. We also had time to reflect with our casas and with people who have jobs in similar fields. I appreciated the chance to talk to other people facing injustices in education systems throughout the region – it helped me feel a little more connected to justice issues that affect my students. Some days I go home feeling like a glorified babysitter and forget about the many issues that my kids face each day in their neighborhood.  It was good to hash out some issues with other teachers and educators.

The absolute highlight of the retreat was the talent show. My casa kicked it out with a fantastic skit about the Program Staff.  We nailed it (she says as humbly as possible)! Seriously, we were hilarious.  The other acts were also great. All the LA houses performed (JD read from one housemate’s grade school diary, CMC performed a 20 minute original musical by one of their housemates, and Ita did a fantastic puppet show. Video links to come!).  Other houses did skits too; one house baked for everyone as their talent…yum!

In other news, tonight we had two Jesuits (one novice and one scholastic) who work at Verb over for dinner. Thanks to our newest house investment, a crockpot, we prepared a delicious meal (though let’s be real…everything we eat is pretty delicious!) and had a blast with our friends.  They live right in the neighborhood and invited us to their Jes Res soon for dinner with their community!

Justice Symposium & Update

On Saturday, I attended Mount St. Mary’s College’s annual Justice Symposium with my community mates, John and Cara. The theme was My link, Our link to Human Trafficking.  I was first formally introduced to human trafficking  as a justice issue while on a service/immersion trip with BC last winter in Puebla, Mexico. Along with my group, I heard a talk about the trafficking, sexual exploitation, and forced labor of women in the southwest region of Mexico.  The talk was powerful and eye-opening. Though our trip primarily focused on environmental justice issues, that one hour session stuck with me.

This weekend I learned so much more about the problem of human trafficking in the United States. Since this “issue” is relatively “new” to the justice system and academia, the terminology is actually quite misleading. According to the Trafficking Victims Protection Reauthorization Act of 2008 (an act which reauthorized and expanded the Trafficking Victims Protection Act enacted in 2000), trafficking laws cover sexual exploitation, domestic servitude, and forced labor; basically, trafficking covers all forms of modern slavery.  The facts and figures thrown around during the day evidenced proved that slavery didn’t end with the emancipation proclamation.

If anything, slaves today are more disposable than they were during the Atlantic Slave Trade era. “Owners” (traffickers, employers, exploiters, etc) no longer have to invest the time and money to keep their slaves alive because the trade is faster and more readily available. Slavery goes hand in hand with many other crimes – kidnapping, drug trade, smuggling of weapons and persons, forged documents, assault, etc.  In the arena of illegal immigration, the differentiation between smuggling and trafficking is an important, and often misunderstood one: persons who are smuggled pay others to help them enter the country illegally, and are then on their own once they cross the border. Persons who are trafficked may believe that is what they signed up for, but once they cross the border they are forced to work in factories, homes, fields, brothels, etc to pay of the ‘debt’ incurred during the smuggling process. Often, the ‘debt’ can never be paid off.   I attended a workshop on the laws and policies in California and the US surrounding trafficking, as well as a workshop about different elements of slavery.  

I could go on and on writing about what I learned during the day. I’d love to continue the conversation, and hope to keep doing research about what I can do.  Instead of rambling any more, I’ll point you to some websites that were shared with us as resources:

Keynote speaker: Ron Soodalter, author of  The Slave Next Door   (I have this on hold at the library…can’t wait to read it.)

Keynote Speaker: Kay Buck  www.castla.org

Free the Salves: www.freetheslaves.net

Not For Sale Campaign: www.notforsalecampaign.org

Polaris Project: www.polarisproject.org

***

A activity few updates since my last post: 

• Julie’s birthday! We celebrated by going out to dinner and with cake back at home. Afterward, Julie, Zach and I went to a West LA karaoke bar where Julie’s boss – and birthday twin! – was having a party. It was hilarious! We didn’t sing but we certainly were entertained.
• VEGAS! Over MLK weekend, about 15 JVs took off for Las Vegas. We did the trip on the cheap by staying in the travel lodge, bringing some of our own food & beverages, gambling only at penny slots (I won $3!), and finding clubs with no cover charge. It was a fantastic weekend filled with lots of football watching, hotel exploring and dancing. [[Note: everything in Vegas really does glitter…we went to mass at a local church and the even wall behind the altar was sparkly!]]
  

  

  The Ladies in Vegas
  

• MLK Spirituality Night: To commemorate Martin Luter King Jr, John planned a spirituality night around his famous “I have a dream” speech. We listened to the speech in its entirety, which I would recommend if you haven’t heard it before.  We then talked about the ‘freedoms’ that are still being fought for in the US today. It was a great night. 
• Dinner with the Petersen’s: After “Fiesta Friday” at Verb (a monthly staff Friday afternoon gathering with food and drink aplenty), Zach’s parents and sister took Casa DK out to dinner in Santa Monica.  It was a treat to spend time with them, as well as with Zach’s youngest sister.
• UCLA Recruitment: On Sunday morning, Julie, Ben, and I went to the 10:30 mass at UCLA’s University Catholic Center. Julie made an awesome announcement about JVC with hopes to recruit a few prospective volunteers.  On Monday, all of Casa DK went back to the UCC for dinner and a panel discussion with interested volunteers. It was interesting to see what campus ministry is like at a secular school, and experience a university setting where Jesuits and JVC aren’t so well known!
• Up Next: We are off to ReOrientation this weekend. For five days we will be at Camp St. Francis in Aptos (where we had orientation). I'm looking forward to the retreat.

Back to School

While I was enjoying a three week vacation from students, two of which I spent in the comfort of my “home home” in New Jersey, many of my students were, to be frank, bored. Three weeks with no classes is a wonderful reward for college students who study their butts off – or don’t – for a semester. But for elementary school students who are still learning study skills and how to be successful, three unstructured weeks is a nightmare. On Monday, the kids were actually excited to be back in school. They complained of being bored at home, and expressed their gratefulness for having a full day of activity between school and Urban Compass (although they still complained come homework time.)

What’s worse is the stories they told of what went down in the projects over break. There’s no knowing what really happened, but as I listened to these stories and imagined them through their eyes, I was scared and sad. “Ms. G,” one of our fifth graders told us, “there was a war in the projects over break.” Another students’ mom was jumped and robbed of a necklace when walking her kids home. Another students’ cousin was shot. The kids’ reactions to these incidents is confusing. They appear sad, but tell the stories so matter-of-factly that I can’t tell gravity of the situation. Not that it matters, really.

This week has been a good one, productive in the office during the day as well as with the kids. I was so excited to see them on Monday, and am grateful that they all came back to the program safe and healthy. Of course by the end of the week I’m exhausted again – that hoarse voice that my mom hears on the phone when we chat during the week hasn’t had much of a rest once program time rolls around. My frustration levels are constantly in flux: in one moment I’m laughing at the hilarity of a five year old playing freeze dance, but in the next I’m so frustrated with a first grader who won’t speak to any of the teachers, and won’t even try to read.

The laughter, though, outweighs the frustrations. Today, I taught a fourth grade boy how to throw a football. Though I don't claim to be a football expert, I've gotten a lot of practice in the last few months and showed him how to hold the ball. This student is particularly challenging - he has trouble controlling his anger and is often mean to other kids, especially if he doesn't get his way. He's a tough nut to crack, and often prefers to play with his first grade brother than kids his own age. Today, for the 10-15 minutes that we were playing catch (the longest I've ever held his attention), the smile on his face didn't go away. He was so proud of himself for being able to throw...he's pretty good! And when I threw to him, he was so excited and yelled, "Ms. Z I catched it!" when I turned to talk to another student. I did a little victory dance for him and he started laughing. I was so proud of him, and honored when he asked me at the end of the day if we can play again tomorrow.

This past weekend we had a few houseguests to Casa DK, and threw a party for the LA JVs, a few former residents of DK, and volunteers from other groups. Otherwise, the weekend consisted of watching playoff football (bye bye Eagles) and bowl games (bye bye other Eagles). This week has been low-key, with most of our energy and excitement going towards planning our spontaneous trip to Vegas this weekend (yes, really!) and making plans for Julie’s birthday!

That’s all for now.  I’m a few hours early, but Happy Birthday Mom!!

Christmas break has come and gone, and it feels like the Urban Compass holiday party was months ago. I was blessed to be able to go home for 10 days, where I spent lots of time with family, friends from Cherry Hill, and even a couple BC friends! It was a lovely break from LA, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss my students and housemates. In fact, I still miss my kids because they have another whole week off before school starts! Oh, LA Unified School District… (but that’s a whole other story). 

Being away from work made me realize how much I do in fact love my job at Urban Compass.  I got lucky Being away from Casa Dorothy Kazel made me realize how important my community is to me on this journey.  In fact, this morning as I was listening to Juanes’ new album (thanks, Santa!) and a line from the first song, “Amigos” stuck out to me:

Compañeras, compañeros de este viaje,

Brindo por ustedes, Brindo por ustedes

Ustedes los amigos verdaderos

Por eso yo les quiero dar

Gracias por estar conmigo

Rough translation, not nearly as poetic as Juanes:

Companions on this journey,

I toast to you, I toast to you,

You, my true friends,

For this I want to give you thanks,

For being with me

How beautiful! The lyrics are just as true about all the family members and friends that are such blessings in my life. What a nice thought at the beginning of 2011.  Happy New Year to all of you!

'Tis the Season

The past week and a half have been filled with lots and lots of events that prove it really IS that time of year. Everyone in my house has celebrated the holidays (usually Christmas) with their agency, and everyone is on their way (or already) home.

‘Tis the Season for OLG

Last Sunday was the festival of Our Lady of Guadalupe. On Friday evening, Julie, Zach and I joined a group of students and staff from verb at a play about Her life at the Cathedral. I’ll be honest – I was expecting a small production of Christmas pageant caliber. Boy was I wrong! The show was an incredible musical production with an enormous cast, elaborate costumes, lights, and more. It was all in Spanish with English subtitles projected on the front of the Cathedral. I loved loved loved the show; the story of OLG is such an important one for much of Latin America. The apparition of Mary to Juan Diego, a native of Mexico who was on the receiving end of Spain’s conquering cruz y espada, marked an important transition in the faith of many in South America. It legitimized for many Spanish and Natives alike that all people are brothers and sisters in Christ, regardless of their nationality.  The story occurred centuries ago, but I was reminded just how relevant it is today during the play. 

‘Tis the Season for Celebrations

Many people all over the city gathered for masses, feasts, and processions to celebrate OLG.  After celebrating Katie’s (of Casa Ita Ford) birthday and Dana’s return to LA with a great 80s themed party, some brave souls headed to Dolores Mission at 3:30 am to begin a very full day of mass, parading, and posole (a pre-Colombian Mexican soup).  The celebration was a bit early for my liking, but I heard great things about it!

Throughout this past week, each of us has celebrated Christmas with our agencies.  Since our schedules were a little crazier than normal, we set aside Tuesday night for a Casa DK Christmas celebration. It was the last time we would all be together for dinner before we started leaving for break!  After a beautiful spirituality night by Julie, I took our ham (yes, we splurged) out of the oven and we feasted.  It was a delicious meal, if I may say so myself!  I’m so grateful for the opportunity to celebrate the holidays, albeit a bit early, with my community. 

Someone encouraged me to reflect on everything that has been new in the past year during advent.  I find it almost overwhelming to acknowledge all the “newness” since last Christmas: a new immersion experience in Mexico, new professional experiences (student teaching and summer internship), new degrees (graduation feels SO long ago!), new friends, new loss, new happiness, new pain, new challenges, and now a new city, new roommates, and a new job. WOW, that’s a LOT of new things in one year. So, we celebrated by doing something not so new: we shared a good meal, good company, and good conversation.  Below is a picture of my roommates around the dinner table, and below that is the picture we used for our house Christmas card to send to our families!

Not super cute, but good enough.
(Note the makeshift advent wreath on the table!)

Much cuter!
Julie, John, Cara, Zach, and Me in Santa Monica
Yes, we coordinated on purpose.
Merry Christmas!

‘Tis the season for glitter and gifts

And now, what has really been consuming my week: the Urban Compass Holiday Party!  Preparations started weeks ago when we gathered gift wish lists from each child, and continued right up until Saturday morning.  Last Sunday, Theresa and I went shopping for food to fill holiday dinner baskets for each family (turkeys, corn, stuffing, potatoes, etc) and gift bags for many of the families. We took over Food4Less and got many strange looks as we checked out with 30-count of, well, everything.  All week we made decorations with the kids, meaning my clothes were constantly covered in glitter and hands covered in paint.  We made clay ornaments, glass ornaments, foam ornaments, wooden ornaments…you get the picture.   The kids had short days all week for parent/teacher conferences so we had them for even more time than normal.  Theresa and I spent Friday transforming the multi-purpose room at Verb into a Christmas wonderland. It looked so good!

the calm before the storm

our tree with all homemade ornaments!

Today, about 120 people filled the room: Urban Compass students, their siblings and parents, high school volunteers, college volunteers, board members, donors, and other families. We had crafts station set up so the kids could decorate cookies, make ornaments, decorate bags, etc. Then, lunch arrived, the kids got their presents (donated by Mater Dei high school students), and the families got their food baskets and gifts.  Some of our families were adopted by friend of Urban Compass. One family with 8 kids under the age of 10 was adopted by a particularly generous family from Pasadena. They had five or six huge Target bags stuffed with clothes and toys. The parents in both families got to chat for a long time which was really cool to see.  The whole party was filled with touching moments like that, as well as lots of sticky, sugary, icing covered treats. I really enjoyed meeting a lot of the parents of my kids and chatting with them for a while. I also got to give some of the families their gifts, and they were elated!  Despite the pouring rain, we had a great turnout and sent everyone away with lots of smiles. It was a great way to end the year J

Merry Christmas to you all! I'm looking forward to my time at home with family and friends over the holidays, and am sending love to those all over the country & world who I won't see! 

Westside vs. Watts Weekend

Last Friday night, a few of my housemates and I attended a Christmas Concert at Mt. St. Mary’s college. The concert was at their Chalon campus, located in the very ritzy hills of the west LA (We heard you pass Dustin Hoffman’s house on the way up to the school?)  The view from “The Mount” was absolutely breathtaking…we could see the lights from all over LA, as well as the ocean. The next day, we went out in downtown Santa Monica to explore the nightlife scene there. We had heard a lot about the bars, and wanted to see for ourselves.  On Sunday, we went back to Santa Monica in the evening for a Christmas tree lighting and holiday concert with some representatives from the other JV houses. Unfortunately, it was pouring rain all evening, so the concert was postponed.  We did get to see the tree lighting and participate in setting the record for most driedels spinning at one time, thanks to the Santa Monica synagogue’s efforts to break the Guinness Book of World Records entry.

My festive weekend was dampened (literally by the rain, but also figuratively) after a few powerful moments in which I recognized what the holiday season is like for my students and their families.    A few stories to illustrate…

1.       On Friday afternoon, I was sitting around with two of my girls, a third grader (PA) and a fourth grader (GG).  (I’ll use initials instead of full names).  I was being super silly with them, singing Christmas carols and asking them questions and talking about who knows what. There was no one else out on the field, so we were just chilling.  At one point, I started singing “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” to make them giggle. (It worked!)  But then, we had this conversation:

GG: Ms. Z., Santa’s not real,

Me: Of course he is, G! Of course Santa’s real!

GG: Nuh-uh, know how I know?

Me: How?

GG: Cause I never get a present.  Only from Urban Compass.

Cue teary eyes. Thank goodness I was wearing sunglasses. My heart broke, right there on the spot. Not knowing what on Earth I could say, I changed the subject and started singing another Christmas song, one that most definitely did NOT include Santa Claus.

2.       Yesterday, Mattel Inc. brought a “Snow Day” to 112^th St. School. It was incredible – they brought in snow machines, a slide for toboggans, free lunch, gifts for all the students, and probably 50 “elves” (staff members).  It was a great day for the kids – they got to play in the snow, have a giant dance party on the playground, etc.  One of Urban Compass’ partner schools (an elementary school in Pasadena) brought down a food donation for 112^th St. School. About a dozen fourth and fifth graders came to deliver the goods and see what the Snow Day was all about. On the way, some of the moms were explaining to the kids that for the 112^th St. students, this might be the most exciting thing about their Christmas season; they don’t get a lot of gifts a home, they don’t have a lot of money, and their families often can’t celebrate in the same ways those students do.  One kid asked the mom, “Well, why don’t they get gifts from Santa? Does Santa like us more than he likes them?” Talk about taking the magic out of the myth.  Again, my heart broke when I heard this story. Watching the visiting students take in the Snow Day was interesting. To them, everything they saw was “so cool!” The kids at 112^th St. were “so lucky!!” “Why don’t we do that?”  Unpacking the reality that this was a very special and rare treat for our students was challenging. Theresa did a great job of explaining that our kids are pretty poor and don’t often get to leave the projects, which left the visiting students pretty depressed.  However, they got to meet some of the Urban Compass kids, and I was amazed at how friendly they were and how quickly they clicked. Every day these kids amaze me.

Remembering Dorothy

Thursday December 2, 2010 marked the 30^th anniversary of the martyrdom of Jean Donovan, Ita Ford, Maura Clarke, and my casa’s namesake: Dorothy Kazel. These four churchwomen were living and working in El Salvador in 1980 with the Maryknoll and Ursuline Sisters. Over the past few months, my community has been learning about all these women.  The four LA communities are named for these martyrs, whose faith and dedication to the poor serve as supreme examples for any of use striving to live out our faith.  I encourage you to read more about their lives and work.

On Thursday evening, we, Casa Dorothy Kazel, attended a remembrance service at Mount St. Mary’s college. The prayer service has been held each year in LA by religious sisters from all different orders.  It was an honor to be invited, and the organizers were thrilled to have the “people who live in Dorothy’s house” attend. At the beginning of the service, everyone – all 60 or so people in attendance – introduced themselves and stated their connection to the four women and where they were when they first hear the news of their deaths. The stories were incredible; the people in attendance all seemed to be on their own journey of faith and service all over the world, but were all devastated upon hearing the news of this martyrdom.  There were religious sisters, middle school students, LA Catholic Workers, community members, members of the press, college students.  They have protested at Fort Benning, lobbied in Washington, lived and worked all over the world, attended the 25^th anniversary of the martyrdom in El Salvador, celebrated the lives of these women for 30 years, been arrested, taught in schools, worked in parishes…you name it, some woman in that room had done it.  The response to petitions read during the service embodies for me how the men and women in the room had been inspired:

God, give us the courage to respond by imitating their lives of service.

Clockwise from top left: Jean Donovan, Ita Ford, Dorothy Kazel, Maura Clark
Also, fun fact: if you do a google-image search for "Dorothy Kazel" you will find pictures of my community from JVC orientation!

Two guests stood out to me in particular: one Ursuline sister who went to college with Dorothy, and who was in the same religious community as she in Cleveland. They were friends.  Also, one of Ita Ford’s nieces was in attendance; she told us how her family was forever changed by the events in El Salvador, and how they have been carried by the many religious men and women.  Making personal connections to Dorothy, Ita, Jean, and Maura was an invaluable experience. Before Thursday night, Dorothy was important to me because her story is so moving, but meeting people who knew her was, well, so personal.  I left the service so grateful for the opportunity to participate and feeling much more connected to our community’s namesake.  At the beginning of advent, it was touching reflection on how my community members and myself are living and serving.